Something I heard when I was standing and the wind came.
It was the grasses I remember
All the canyons layering on top of each other the black rocks in Czechoslovakia, this serpentine canyon —
Just sorting memories
Between real and imagined
both are important to me
You in the river, that was like yesterday.
How was i the only one not in that video?
I saw you
In the music
In the river
In your boots and sandals your bare feet stained in the rain
Your dress touching the water
You are sometimes very beautiful
Lately, I have been hiding — practicing my manners.
Realizing I still don’t have an income that will bring me any success
The grass blowing
Lying down in the sun
Your purple hat
Your bare arms in the cold
Your sister – the seriousness of her illness –
Remember just before the incident she said, in between open and close there is confusion.
I will paint what I told myself to paint
I will no longer just scribble around
I’m tired at looking at these lonely places on the internet
How have I left myself so vulnerable still? Don’t you see where the world is heading or has headed?
Do I ever learn the right lessons?
I worry too much
You don’t seem to worry too much to me
I worry I will forget
All of it
Forget what needs forgetting
I worry the inspired moments are wasted on some escapade that always starts from nothing and ends with nothing
I am sitting now
Wishing the day would come to me, jump through the window, drag me out to the desert find me a hot springs
It’s lonely out there
And, I would no longer linger in this limbo
The spider webs dance like blankets in the wind when it gets this cold
Yeah, they are everywhere
My dream journal says Colombia runners
Hmm sounds like your not paying attention
Checkpoint Mexico driving
Difficult walking in the rain
Vladimir and I play the drums
Sarah says more of this
It is good
Rachel stands next to her blue feathered map. or is it beaded? Toshi silhouette wild things in his hair – a staff.
My students come to get me. They laugh and smile they form a human chain linking arms. They move through the tall windy grass. It is night. They say, “We are taking you across the border. Don’t be afraid!” I prepare the house for the travel.
There are many young people in his group filling cups with color and readying the projector. He stands by me….in the grove animals show up….ibis…we turn to watch…They run down to ask something about the sound. Claudia smiles about something. The audience gathers…I fold my body and glide into the grass grove to watch the birds.
My mother and father sit together on my couch
they talk about family
speak like friends, lovers
my mom disappears
leaves notes in town
my father finds work
I am listening to the world
I visited the baby marty delivered
pauline comes through the house
you speak the sea
he says they use you like a weapon in there
“That’s a good song”
she steals the pink flowers
she plans her escape
she jumps into the train with the baby
she hurts herself
Norman L.’s Tao book cactus blossom pressed in pages
I am jumping in four directions remembering my songs I realize every song ever is a dream
I have to pack for a train, I can’t do it
I am with you in a sea town
water pours around you. I wonder what to do next. you hold your head
I look back to see women walking on the water across the river
will they make it?
Andrea visits she brings gifts and shows us how this poem
She tells us what IO and PO did.
I prepare a floating bed in the deep water with flower petals
I am in a small town going between the crowded rooms talking to families I recognize my students
Eddie says, “don’t be a burden!”
my protective forces are strong
It is what I do to to survive
“I see you on a horse”
“That sounds about right, I am trying to see if the saddle fits so I can ride.”
Ms Uslan says I should have a look around
I don’t have proper shoes
A sea storm about to travel
Hiding from strange men
Sweatshirt for friend’s child
Eddie and Marty are sitting on a ladder
Editing poetry journal pronoun–
it is important
I travel to Pamela’s house
Stay a few days, I take all her black clothes with silver and gold.
Pamela says, “Don’t be afraid of your education.”
Are you leaving?
Do you like in there?
Black marble bathroom
We are fixing the root
There are houses
You are holding something
A white peacock
In the field
You have friends working the land
We walk through the neighborhood
The dirt road
This is precious
I have my pictures with me
I am piloting down the canal
The rain is misting
We are deep in the canyon forest
You find the train cars tied with fancy string
Light hums in a city room
Yesenia is writing a book
A red Kite for Tosh
Josh is fixing the wood-shed door
Hanging from the roof
A huge sky
Traveling with a little food in the bag
No-one knows I am here
I am arriving
Walking the dark trail I almost turn back
Grass and sea
A circle of images
Photographs brewing in a pot
Secrets inside a rock
I am younger
Keys to the house
Caught in the house
I take my time walking to Russia
White dress covered with bracelets
Dark fills to the falls
“are you ok?”
Ismenia says,” It is difficult Ms. Reed.”
“The baby is having a hard time”
Yaya’s hermano visits
Long black hair
The people organizing
The sheriff laughing
I introduce myself to the video class
Your father is herr
You are in the back of the room
He wants to see you
She lets him go in to the night, away from the crowd
He said he would be there
You do not know he is here
you are not well
I just remembered,
your father is dead
I see him in a dream this morning
He wants me to tell you he will be there
This is precious, i say. I have my pictures with me. i am piloting down the canal. I am in the water. The rain is misting.we are deep in the mountains. The canyon forest. You see the train cars tied with fancy string. I dig in my journal from last year this time “I dream my aunt dies and no one tells me. we live underground.by the canal. I dream my uncle with a necklace goes into the hospital.” You tell me your brother accepts his mother’s home. He is moving today from the streets – living in his car. you talk to him. We make Coffee.
i find an enchanted book of children’s paintings. They are mine and yours. A red deer. A plane.
Gerardo tells me not to fight. To listen. The sunrise is un-explainable. terrible city so many homeless.. Birds gathering force. clarity before retractions of fog. . .I dream my teachers, arguing, unhappy. I go for it i teach the children the idea of movement. They dance water and playing soccer and raising their hands to the sky. They beat the sky and say the names. the ones who did not make it back to them — across the border. Emily says between open and close there is confusion. He dances in his work boots . Man, this traffic is serious. He dances in his boots just days before the election. there is a white heron. a mattress across the river road in the grass by the building. still. Hunting.
There are people in my life who would rather be consumed by fire than to go on living.
into the river
you will return
i cling to the wall kicking snails into the water
is there nothing to offer?
you wait with the question
shoes falling apart in the rain
memories and death
fires look different
i don’t know what they tell you
but the fires come here